good life

Taylor has been different than my other babies in that I have been able to enjoy it all so much more. I don't know why, it's just been nice. I've been able to soak it all in. Maybe compared to the months of March and April when I was getting final projects for school done early, packing, moving, being pregnant and the emotions that come with it, and Justin was working so much he wasn't around to help much. But this baby thing - I can do this! Kissing, nursing, snuggling, sleeping - I'm really anxious about coming home in the fall and facing real life again.


6 lbs. 2 oz. - 19 inches

The day before she was born I had an ultrasound per order of the doctor out here as I was measuring small. I almost didn't go because I felt I had too many other things to do and I always measure small. But for whatever reason I went. It was then I found out she was frank breech and I had almost no fluid. I had made the connection with the tech doing the ultrasound that we were in the same ward and she opened up and told me she would not continue care with the doctor she worked for (bold of her!) as the doctor only did c-sections in this case. She told me about versions (turning the baby head down from the outside by pressing on the stomach). She told me there are doctors that specialize in doing this and that if it was successful I could have a vaginal birth. I am so grateful to have met her, I credit her with the way things turned out. Within two hours after the birth I was able to get in the the best high risk doctor in Knoxville who had written the book (literally) on versions. He agreed to try a version the next day, with the warning that because I had no fluid it would probably not work. If it didn't, he would perform the c-section right there.
The rest of that day and night were hard. Justin was working and the kids were horrible. I just wanted a sweet last night with my kids but it wasn't to be. The next day I was still barely holding it together. They finally held got me in did a spinal block in case it didn't work and so I wouldn't feel the pain of someone pushing hard on my stomach. A few minutes later I remember hearing the comment from one of the doctors, "Wow, somebody must be listening to your prayers!" just as I was ending a prayer. And I realized it had worked. I fell apart then and cried with relief. After that we began the waiting game to see if Taylor would calm down enough to start pitocin. After 5 hours, her heart rate was still too low so the doctor tried something else a bit unconventional. He put fluid back in my uterus and she calmed right down. The doctor was very excited. He told me some of the doctors couldn't believe he tried the version in the first place. But from the moment we met him and discussed this plan of attack I felt very good about it. I was induced and about 6 hours later she was born. It was emotionally such a draining day, thinking about it again is making me tired.
I wanted a vaginal birth because I want the option of having a natural birth next time (this time didn't work out) and I want all odds on my side. I believe Taylor was supposed to be born in Tennessee. I'm fairly certain I would never have had that last ultrasound with the midwives clinic in Utah (I never had one that late in pregnancy with the other kids) and who knows how it could have ended up with me having no fluid and breech!? I feel so blessed, so lucky, so overwhelmed with the opportunity to be a mom to three amazing spirits.



proud daddy and the damage to our car that happened just before she was born


the kids were so quiet and at a loss for words when they saw her for the first time


our only visitors were Ryan Starks, and Jessica and her kids. I could tell the nurses really felt badly for me, especially when they found out we had arrived in Knoxville only 4 days before!





A few pictures from the first few days home

Have I mentioned Ellie is the BEST helper? Now when she gets me something she asks, "Were you thinking that you don't know what you would do without me?" and I answer, "YES!"